Relationships counselling

Rainy, dark. I should really be in bed.

Yesterday Hol and I went to see a psychologist/counsellor/relationships kind of person who was recommended to us by a community health centre as someone with experience helping "rainbow families" with planning for their (presumably multicoloured) babies. I was dubious and terribly hopeful that she'd be amazing at the same time. Dubious because I really wasn't at all sure that we had anything to talk to her about and I didn't want to spend the money telling a stranger about our plans if she wasn't going to be helpful, but terribly hopeful too because the closer we get, the more I feel like it would be very nice to have someone who's seen it all before to be there with some steady advice and cheerful practicality if we happened to need it!

She was great. She got us both talking, fished around in our language untangling what we meant with the inadequate words we have to describe relationships between us all, made sure we both got heard, kept Hollie's waffling on track and noticed when she hit the nerve with me about feeling very responsible for everyone. She also seemed genuinely excited for us, which is flattering, and gave the distinct impression that she thought us fit and proper parents (yes, I was looking for approval... Do you ever grow out of it?) She was sharp and kind, my two main criteria.

So, although I didn't really get much from the session in terms of new information or huge emotional revelations, the feeling of security, knowing that she's there and will be on top of everybody's best interests if any of us wanted her, it's a really good feeling.

In other news, we figured out a plan for the kitchen over the last week and I got all nerdy with Google Sketch Up, and now we know how we can fit in a dishwasher. Having a dishwasher is on the very top of my to do list for before we are allowed to have a baby, plus the kitchen we have now is functional but quite overwhelmingly made of brown faux wood grain laminate and quite strangely shaped so it is very exciting to think that we might be up for a change sometime soon.

That's it! I have to go to bed before I ruin a day of teaching for myself tomorrow by being too tired to enjoy the little guys!

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